Lemme tell you, you'll never feel quite so much like a foreigner as you do being in another country on the 4th of July. No one here is wearing red, white & blue! There are no high school marching bands in parades! No barbecues! No fireworks! No hayrides! No burning your hands with sparklers! No politicians giving speeches and kissing babies! What's wrong with these people? I just watched a fireworks display in Boston on a TV station here -- but since this is the same station that airs reruns of "Dallas" and "The Love Boat" for all I know this fireworks show could have been taped in 1986. Anyway, watching them on TV just isn't the same as seeing (and hearing!) them in person. *sigh*
And now a little story about volunteering. Sometimes it doesn't pay to be helpful. In fact, sometimes YOU pay in order to volunteer. Let me 'splain... (Oh, and don't worry -- it has nothing to do with the dog rescue folks -- we still LOVE them and what they do.)
Joel and I were asked to volunteer at a picnic for a group of expatriates in Antigua. We were fine with helping and I was also interested in networking at the event because in Guatemala it's not WHAT you know, but WHO you know. We were also told there would be "free food and drinks -- burgers, hot dogs, soda, beer and wine." Our job was to play games with the kids -- no problem! We met with Judy, the sweet old lady in charge of the event (she LOVES Joel, by the way) and she was sooo excited that we agreed to help. She said she loved our enthusiasm and was looking forward to us helping out and getting to meet the other expats. She even told us not to be shy, to mingle and say hello to people at the picnic. Then she said, "Ok, I'll let one of you have lunch free, but you (looking at me) will have to pay Q50 for lunch." (Q50 is about $6.50) WHAAAT? My eyebrows went so far up my forehead they became part of my scalp... I've volunteered for many things in my life and I don't recall ever having to PAY to attend an event I was helping at. Especially a picnic with burgers and hot dogs -- what? You can't spare ONE burger for a volunteer? Oh! And check out the picture of the hats she bought for us to wear -- you know when you see hats like this, good times are sure to follow. Sooo, we got to the picnic and...well, let's just say there are more OLD expats in this group than young ones. And old expats don't have kids here. There were a total of four kids. Yep, 1-2-3-FOUR. So we played frisbee, did the water balloon toss, blew bubbles, jumped rope, hula hooped, etc... All while wearing those AMAZINGLY FUN FUN FUN hats! 
Oh, and did I mention the pinata*? Joel and I were also in charge of the pinata (Eeyore -- who is so freaking depressing I've always had the urge to beat him with a stick myself -- candy or not) which included putting the candy inside. The night before the picnic we surgically removed a portion of his head (Eeyore's -- not Joel's) to cram the candy in. After a few minutes we realized the operation was NOT a success because the candy was stuck inside the head and not "draining" into the body. So Joel took the broom handle, jammed it into Eeyore's head, forcing the candy down his esophagus and into his belly. Good times, good times, I tell ya... Anyway, back to the picnic. We entertained the kids while their parents ate, drank and got merry. (This is a joke because it was a pretty lame -- ooops, sorry -- I meant TAME picnic.) When we got a break, I paid for my lunch and ate my $6.50 hamburger and chips. Yummy! Had a Sprite because lo and behold, they were also charging for the beer and wine. (Surprised?) And rather than getting to network, Judy said, "I need you to eat your lunch and then go back out there and play with those kids." I'm not sure if Judy is in that "When I Am Old I Will Wear Purple" stage of life where she blurts out whatever is in her head, but daaaaang! Joel and I agreed we felt like we were merely the hired help and couldn't enjoy our lunch. So, to make a long story short, yes, the four kids seemed to have fun. Yes, Eeyore met a terrible death (but not by my hands, darn it). Yes, we wore our hats ALL. DAMN. DAY. Will we ever volunteer with this group again? Nooooo. Would we prefer to walk rescue dogs in the pouring rain and pick up their poo? Oh, heck yeah! Even though the dogs can't talk, I feel far more appreciated working with them.
Oh, and did I mention the pinata*? Joel and I were also in charge of the pinata (Eeyore -- who is so freaking depressing I've always had the urge to beat him with a stick myself -- candy or not) which included putting the candy inside. The night before the picnic we surgically removed a portion of his head (Eeyore's -- not Joel's) to cram the candy in. After a few minutes we realized the operation was NOT a success because the candy was stuck inside the head and not "draining" into the body. So Joel took the broom handle, jammed it into Eeyore's head, forcing the candy down his esophagus and into his belly. Good times, good times, I tell ya... Anyway, back to the picnic. We entertained the kids while their parents ate, drank and got merry. (This is a joke because it was a pretty lame -- ooops, sorry -- I meant TAME picnic.) When we got a break, I paid for my lunch and ate my $6.50 hamburger and chips. Yummy! Had a Sprite because lo and behold, they were also charging for the beer and wine. (Surprised?) And rather than getting to network, Judy said, "I need you to eat your lunch and then go back out there and play with those kids." I'm not sure if Judy is in that "When I Am Old I Will Wear Purple" stage of life where she blurts out whatever is in her head, but daaaaang! Joel and I agreed we felt like we were merely the hired help and couldn't enjoy our lunch. So, to make a long story short, yes, the four kids seemed to have fun. Yes, Eeyore met a terrible death (but not by my hands, darn it). Yes, we wore our hats ALL. DAMN. DAY. Will we ever volunteer with this group again? Nooooo. Would we prefer to walk rescue dogs in the pouring rain and pick up their poo? Oh, heck yeah! Even though the dogs can't talk, I feel far more appreciated working with them. 
Speaking of the dogs, we've been taking them to a local coffee farm (finca) for long walks. One of the other rescue people (Linda) knows the farm owner and has permission to go there. The farm is huuuuge and completely enclosed so the dogs can't run out into a street or anything. It's shaded by huge trees and there are rows and rows of coffee plants. Some of the dogs can be trusted to be off a leash and come back (Savannah and Chula), while others (Hoover) will bolt and never be seen again. The ones off the leash take off like rockets and fly around through the coffee plants. It's hilarious to watch Chula (the puppy) try to keep up. We took some pictures of Hoover the first time he rode in our car and other than trying to get in the back seat, he did great! The second time Hoover was in our car, he barfed in the back (which we didn't discover until the next day --- eeeeeeew!). Luckily, we have a large rubber mat back there, so cleanup was easy (for Joel, not me). Oh, and we have a new batch of puppies to work with! They are little black and brown mutts and cute as can be. They're all teeth and fur at this point (people are just giant chew toys to them) but they'll grow out of it. 
So! There you have it. Another exciting email from Central America. I hope everyone had a really great 4th of July and enjoyed your weekend!Until later, stay thirsty my friends...
-Jennifer
* As we were stuffing Eeyore with candy, I came up with an EXCELLENT idea for a pinata. Well, if you are like me, you will think this is brilliant. I like candy and all, but a pinata full of BACON would be my dream. It could be in the shape of a pig, and what's more fun that a pig full of BACON? And rather than using a stick to beat it to death, you use a loaf of french bread -- and you can eat the bread with your bacon. Oh yummy yummy BAAACONNNN. (And I know what you're thinking, "Ummm, is Jen too close to the equator for her own good? Is her brain getting fried in the sun? What's with this talk of bacon and pinatas?" Rest assured, I'd be like this even if I was living in Greenland.)
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